Are you guilty as a Mother?

"My son doesn't like rice!"

"My daughter wouldn't eat without switching on the TV."

"My kid hardly eats anything."

"My kiddo is so short and weak, what to do about this kid. I'm just fed up."

All of us have heard same or similar mutterings around us from mothers. Old, new, doesn't matter. Almost all the mothers in their lifetime, knowingly or unknowingly make negative statements about their kids. 

If you are not one of those, portraying a negative picture of your kid, then your kid would have been shining in the glory of your positive affirmation. No doubt.

WHY KIDS BEHAVE THE WAY, THEY DO.

Kids are no exception. If somebody praises your particular dress or behavior, you notice that you also like to adore that. You get regular in wearing that dress, which was appreciated. Or, you start behaving the way, people appreciate you the most. This is human psychology. Our kids are no different.

The day we understand this cause and effect game, we would understand - why our kids behave the way, they do.

OTHER FACTORS INFLUENCE KIDS' BEHAVIOR, TOO.

I accept that there is peer pressure, television and internet influence, relatives' coaxing and personal preferences. All these factors influence the kids' behavior. But there is no denying the greatest influence of parents, especially mother's perception of her kid. 

Parents, especially mother is the first human contact a child has. he modulates his behavior according to the perception and attitude of the mother. 

If, on a regular basis, mother keeps on saying that "my kid doesn't do this." "my kid doesn't do that." Then, kids start accepting that perception. Subconsciously they understand that their mother knows them the best. 

So, next time, please say what you mean. Say what you want your kid to be like. Perceive as if your kid is behaving the way, you wish. 

It'll take some time, but not a very long time. At least give that much time to the new pattern to take place, as much you have already damaged it.

One more important thing, be relaxed and organized yourself. We are the role models for our kids. No matter how much they take from outside,  Inside, they want to belong to us only.

FATHERS DON'T LACK BEHIND.

I particularly address mothers even if I know some of the fathers specialize in criticism. They look at the kid not as a kid but as a competition. As an investment. 

Whereas for a mother, a kid is an extension of herself. She always feels lacking in taking care of her kid, for some reason or the other.  That's the reason, she expresses her more out of concern. Not knowing that her negative concern would transfer as negative behavior to the child.

I hope next time when we utter anything which says,"my kid doesn't do......" we rather say,"my kid likes to do......" and fill this blank with the words we wish right for our kid.



(*If your child is suffering from malnutrition or lack of appetite despite your positive behavior and a regular routine of the child, then please consult a medical practitioner.)